Don, 29 Comedian

Don shot us down before we could even ask it of him, claiming the mustache is for gay men only, and that he is way too vain for a stache anyway. “The last time mustaches were cool was when girls were calling guys “mack” and guys were calling girls “dames.” He wouldn’t be caught dead with a mustache, and if he was, he would make sure to have a cork in his ass just in case.